Monday, February 9, 2015

And So It Begins: Girl on Fire

Back in September when I somehow (read: God) got a perfect score on the verbal section of the GRE, I managed to hold back my tears of gratitude, overwhelming joy, and surprise until I got to my car. When I finally shut the door and turned the car on, rain started pouring down, and this song started playing on the radio.


Since then, "Girl on Fire" has been my unofficial theme song as I've fought my way through a few really wonderful, but surprisingly difficult months. And I'd especially think of it when I was struggling or discouraged with grad school applications, as a reminder that I could and would do it and rock it and that my future was in my hands and God's hands and that it would all work out. Because I have flame in my eyes and in my heart, and I'm going to light up the world.

So anyway. Since I finished my grad school applications a few days ago, I've been going stir crazy. Since my part is completely done, I just want to KNOW. I want my acceptances or rejections so that I can have another part in deciding my future again. This means that I have been checking my school email compulsively while at work (oh yeah, I got a real job. I will write about it soon). Constantly. But a few minutes after I got home, I opened my email, not expecting anything, and saw an email from one of my schools: "Brandeis Joint MA."

My heart stopped. Opening that email was almost like opening my mission call, suspense and excitement and terror. Except I didn't have any warning or time to prepare like I did with my mission call. And when I opened it, I read these words:

"Dear Rachel Ashby:

I'm delighted to tell you that the faculty committee in English and Women's, Gender, and Sexuality Studies at Brandeis will be recommending to the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences that you be admitted to our Joint M.A. Program. We were highly impressed with your application, and we think that your interests would be an excellent fit with our vibrant community of graduate students and faculty. "

I. AM. IN.

I don't know if I'll end up at Brandeis. My hope is to get into more schools and have options. But even if this is the only school I get accepted to, I'd be THRILLED to go to Boston and be a part of this program. I am so grateful for God's help and for the loving support of so many people who have gotten me here. I have just been in shock all night that this is really happening.

I'm going to grad school, guys. This girl is on fire.